Posts Tagged ‘area’

Today, my friend called to warn me that there was a tornado in the area. I immediately hung up and drove 15 minutes to a safe place. When I turned on the radio, I found out that the tornado was where I drove to. FML

Today, I went in for a steroid shot in my lower spine. when the doctor can in with a needle I thought it was to numb the area. turns out it wasn’t the numbing but the actual extremely painful shot. He thought the nurses already sedated me. FML

Today, a powerful thunderstorm rolled through my area. I’d forgotten I’d left my sunroof open. FML

Today, the supervisory staff at work was changed in my area. The good news? My boyfriend is now my manager. The bad news? My ex, the guy I cheated on my boyfriend with, is our supervisor. FML

Today, I went paintballing with a few of my friends. The paintballs didn’t hurt, until I was hit in the testicles from five feet away. On my way out of the area I was hit in the testicles again, by a teammate. FML

Today, on my first day as a taxi driver, I took a man 200 miles away from my area, feeling happy about the price of the fare. He ran away without paying, leaving nothing but a bag of dirty clothes. FML

Today, I was bored at work looking at a sex offender list of my area. After a couple pages, I saw my uncle. FML

Today, some police officers walked up and down my street locking unlocked car doors to prevent theft. I keep my doors unlocked because my key only works for the ignition. Unaware of this, they locked mine. Sure, criminals are now locked out forever, but so am I. FML